Turning 30!

I’m turning 30 in a couple of hours, and honestly I am panicking!!!

What is life beyond 29?

All I know is that I’m getting old, and that I’m suppose to embrace a life of adulthood, where everything is about maturity, and grace, stability, and so on and so forth. The expectation list could go on endlessly actually.

I tried ‘googling’ life @ 30 to check whether or not it is normal for me to feel this way. Turns out, I’m not alone. 🙂

I decided to take some time to process my emotions, and I realized that I’m having mixed feelings about this whole 30th birthday of mine. Whilst I’m anxious about life after 20’s, I’m also actually happy and elated looking back at the memorable things that happened in my life. I mean, for me it’s still surreal to be at the very spot in life where I am at the moment. I did always give my best — one of the things I learned from the Jesuits — but I’d be lying if I’d say that it was all hard-work. I must say that I was greatly blessed, and I owe it all to Him who is watching from up above.

I’ve decided to dedicate this post to Him in thanksgiving for the many blessings He has gifted me.

Lord, you’ve made feel Your presence today
despite my sinfulness,
my arrogance,
selfishness,
my worldly desires.

I was unworthy,
yet You came.
I was empty,
and You filled me.
I was lonely,
and You gave me comfort.
I was lost,
and You gave me light.

I cried, Lord, when You said:

“I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus.” John 17:23
“He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you.” Romans 8:31
“And to tell you that I am not counting your sins.” 2 Corinthians 5:18-19
“Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled.” 2 Corinthians 5:18-19
“His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you.” 1 John 4:10
“I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love.” Romans 8:31-32

How great is Your love, Lord!
How wonderful!
“What am I that You should love me
and hold me as Your dearest love of all?”

Thank you, Lord.
Thank you.
Thank you for Your great love and mercy.
Know that I love You too…

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